One morning, while I was pouring my husband some orange juice, he told me he feels guilty drinking it because it's expensive. We talked about it and discovered he had made that decision back when he was a "poor college student." Thankfully, we can now easily afford it, but it made me think about the decisions people make in their lives.
The orange juice story is a perfect, albeit very simplistic, example of people holding onto thoughts that are no longer valid. When my husband made the decision that juice was too expensive, it was a decision that was right for him at the time. At his age, and in his stage of life, the decision was appropriate. But time changed things. He grew up, has a good job and is financially comfortable. He simply forgot to reevaluate his idea of the cost of orange juice. This was an easy fix.
It gets more complicated when working with decisions that are made about life in general. Many of our ideas were concluded when we were children, before our brains were fully developed. Children don't have the brain power or life experience to determine if their ideas are good or correct, but they make conclusions with their limited knowledge, and usually hang onto them for a lifetime.
Some children conclude that in order to be loved, they must be "good," quiet, submissive, get good grades, etc. Some assume that the only way to be safe, is to put up an energetic wall in front of their heart, needing to be cautious about who they let into their life. Children come up with all sorts of ideas about life. As an adult, we've usually forgotten when or how these conclusions were made, and accept them as truth.
When an adult is given an opportunity to go back in time, in their mind's eye, to look at those decisions with an adult perspective, it can be surprising to them to learn when and how their decisions were made. They can then see how their life was affected, and come to a new understanding of their situation. Re-evaluation of their decisions can help them realize that they don't have to act a certain way to receive love, and can be safe without barriers to their heart.
Heart Centered Therapy (HCT) is a beautiful, respectful way to do this. HCT is done while the client is in a meditative state so the mind can be quiet enough to listen to the intelligence of the heart. Issues, or behaviors, that seemed impossible to figure out, become clear so we can open to new, more enlightened, ideas and thought patterns.
The facts of what happens in your life does not determine who you are. The exact same thing can happen to two people, and it may traumatize one person, and have little effect on the other. It's truly about the feelings associated with what happens, and the decisions that are made because of them, that have tremendous effects.
Revisiting your feelings of being in a situation, understanding how those feelings created life decisions, and then re-evaluating your conclusions with the knowledge and experience you have today, can totally transform your life.
For some, it may just make them feel more comfortable with the words, "Please pass the juice."
The orange juice story is a perfect, albeit very simplistic, example of people holding onto thoughts that are no longer valid. When my husband made the decision that juice was too expensive, it was a decision that was right for him at the time. At his age, and in his stage of life, the decision was appropriate. But time changed things. He grew up, has a good job and is financially comfortable. He simply forgot to reevaluate his idea of the cost of orange juice. This was an easy fix.
It gets more complicated when working with decisions that are made about life in general. Many of our ideas were concluded when we were children, before our brains were fully developed. Children don't have the brain power or life experience to determine if their ideas are good or correct, but they make conclusions with their limited knowledge, and usually hang onto them for a lifetime.
Some children conclude that in order to be loved, they must be "good," quiet, submissive, get good grades, etc. Some assume that the only way to be safe, is to put up an energetic wall in front of their heart, needing to be cautious about who they let into their life. Children come up with all sorts of ideas about life. As an adult, we've usually forgotten when or how these conclusions were made, and accept them as truth.
When an adult is given an opportunity to go back in time, in their mind's eye, to look at those decisions with an adult perspective, it can be surprising to them to learn when and how their decisions were made. They can then see how their life was affected, and come to a new understanding of their situation. Re-evaluation of their decisions can help them realize that they don't have to act a certain way to receive love, and can be safe without barriers to their heart.
Heart Centered Therapy (HCT) is a beautiful, respectful way to do this. HCT is done while the client is in a meditative state so the mind can be quiet enough to listen to the intelligence of the heart. Issues, or behaviors, that seemed impossible to figure out, become clear so we can open to new, more enlightened, ideas and thought patterns.
The facts of what happens in your life does not determine who you are. The exact same thing can happen to two people, and it may traumatize one person, and have little effect on the other. It's truly about the feelings associated with what happens, and the decisions that are made because of them, that have tremendous effects.
Revisiting your feelings of being in a situation, understanding how those feelings created life decisions, and then re-evaluating your conclusions with the knowledge and experience you have today, can totally transform your life.
For some, it may just make them feel more comfortable with the words, "Please pass the juice."
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